The Love Addiction ~ick~
I use the term love addiction because it’s what the clinical world gave us.
But honestly?
I don’t love it.
It pathologizes attachment wounds and makes people feel broken for wanting connection.
Traditional frameworks (like those from Pia Mellody and Kelly McDaniel) helped many people name patterns around abandonment, obsession, and self-abandonment.
That matters.
But the word addiction often lands as:
“What’s wrong with me?”
When what’s really happening is:
Your nervous system learned that intimacy equals danger, inconsistency, or survival.
So it adapted.
What gets labeled love addiction is usually:
Trauma bonding
Attachment panic
Emotional dysregulation
Early relational deprivation
Not moral failure. Not lack of willpower.
Just a system trying to regulate itself through people.
You don’t heal that by white-knuckling boundaries.
You heal it by understanding your protective imprint — the specific strategy your system uses to avoid pain, loss, or abandonment.
If you’ve ever felt broken for wanting closeness, please hear this:
You’re not addicted to love.
You’re responding to unmet attachment needs.
I talk about this stuff — gently and honestly — over on Instagram. No pathologizing. No performative healing. Just real conversations about nervous systems, relationships, and recovery.
And when you’re ready to go deeper, the Protective Imprints Quiz can help you understand your patterns at a body level.